((inspired by this magnificent post))

  • Combeferre: It's not a big deal. I've seen Enjolras' stuff, like, a million times.
  • Courfeyrac: Why haven't I seen it?
  • Combeferre: Why do you want to see it?
  • Courfeyrac: He's my best friend! What if Enjolras gets into an accident? What if he's horribly disfigured and I have to identify him, and all that remains are his private parts? And I'm standing there saying, "Sorry officer, I can't help you. Because no, I haven't seen his penis."

“Level-headed mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick-punching arsonist.”

Enjolras to Combeferre, Book IV (via bolkonskys)



so if heaven and hell decide
that they both are satisfied
illuminate the ‘no’s on their vacancy signs
if there’s no one beside you
when your soul embarks
then i’ll follow you into the dark




why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?

*sighs* because the ‘pee’ is silent

no because it’s dead